The "why not" in the why

I needed a break from tearing up revised 20-page drafts of the book I supposedly have been working on for the past one month or so. It's a fuzzy feeling inside your tummy when you spend sleepless nights on the weekend punching in keys, putting down memories and ideas that make you smile or chuckle a little, and on a Monday morning when you take advantage of office supplies to take a printout of the first two chapters only to frown upon your efforts as substandard and scrap the whole thing to shreds and dump them into the same dustbin where your friends have put the newspaper shards in which they got idlis for breakfast from the local vendor! To have literary work swimming around in a puddle of half opened packs of idli chutney and chutki wrappers is the end of all that is sacred about writing.

So here I am, probably more out of dire need for a change than a motivation to bore you to death with my endless ramblings. The idea of what I am writing about originally cropped into my head as I was running one evening along the Bandra skyway as practice for the upcoming marathon (don't mention the marathon or ask about it - its too painful!!). Looking around we tend to form stereotypes of the kind of people we see fit to do certain things or in general like we so love to put it as, "pull it off". The concept is flawed. The perspective is biased. The consequence is unimaginably so obsolete that we no longer let our horizons expand. We limit ourselves not based on our capabilities but more because its something we are not "cut out for". If I were to list down all such things for even the colony I stay in, let alone the entire world, I'd probably have outlived the number of years Rip Van Winkle slept for. So in turn I'm going to elaborate on a few things I had in my head that were "just-not-me" with a resolve that some day, hopefully, either me or someone very like me is going to shatter and show to the world how nonsensical it has been!

The I-am-too-skinny-to-ride-an-Avenger stereotype - Now I know Western movies and all those god-forsaken biker movies have put it in our heads to appreciate the straw-chewing-corner-of-the-mouth-swearing macho men, and that those are the kinds girls usually oogle after and shout out "OMG I love him" in their oh so annoying shrieks. I have also been informed by certain discreet members of the fairer sex that they would love to hug a hunk riding a Hunk (its a bike for all you ignorant fools!) than have their heart shoot up in their mouth for fear of falling off a bike being ridden by a "slinky"!! SLINKY ?!??!?! What are skinny people thought of as - some sort of invertebrates who just wobble around for want of space ?! Here is what I propose. There will be one day when I ride an Avenger, hell even a Harley Davidson (yes I know my bikes thank you very much !!), and that day who'll be seated won't be a bulked blob of meat, but a nicely trim bloke, thin, drawing the oohs and aahs from those who mock me after reading this post! ;)

The gymming-is-for-fat-people stereotype - If at any moment during the previous post you thought am a lobbyist for the "skeletal warriors", guess again. Thin people are equally dumb. Recommend them a day at the gym, and snap comes the judgement that exercise is for those suffering from obesity. Do there numbskulls not realise that there is a section called "Cardio" which is different from the WEIGHTS section ?! Its rather "cool" to be the guy who can dive under the small gaps of gates and get the tennis ball that the fat boy so idiotically hit into some grumpy lady's tea garden, but its equally shameful when that same guy is the one who had to hide behind a tree for fear of being blown away when torrential winds started blowing on a Bombay afternoon! Grow up.

The you-must-have-puked-at-least-once stereotype - Okay. I know people might judge you on drinking and shake their heads in disapproval. I like alcohol. So get over it! I don't claim to be a professional drunkard. Hell am not even aware of all the delicacies that lie beyond Indian shores, the endless wonders that lay hidden in bottles of a 20 year vintage at least. But I would say that I handle alcohol well. I get tipsy. I get ecstatic. I love to dance when am tipsy. I wobble and move as if my feet are independent of my body. And yes, I have never puked after getting drunk. Standard argument: "You are lying. You can't take in that much alcohol and not puke." For the uninformed dimwits who think drinking too much is the only cause for nausea, its usually not. Mixing types of liquor is what messes your system up. Keep it simple and restrict yourself to one or two types and you're aces. If you're the kind who thinks a lil bit of everything is good paisa wasool, do not expect others to be as idiotically inclined as you!

The you-are-a-square-because-you-went-to-business-school stereotype - Just a few words matey. You and me, on stage, your day, your time, your place. Lets see who can get that CIRCLE of imagination fired up with his square edges! ;)

The .. Ah chuck it. I could write reams on all these stereotypes, but am going to stop here. Not for want of pity on your sore red eyes, but more so because I'd rather have people think it out what stereotypes they have developed and communicated to others, eventually discouraging themselves and others from going beyond what they thought was possible.

When a friend of mine walked up to me and told me "why" I'd prefer riding an Avenger when I'd be better off going around on a Pulsar, I asked him "why not". He smirked. That smirk is what am going to wipe off some day! ;)